Have you ever heard a song play and thought; wow, I totally feel you on that?
When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
When high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
What's Important To You?
So many things to think about. Many decisions to be made. Many risks to take...and mistakes to make. So much to think about, yet so little time to think. So you take your chances and you think your thoughts... Where does that leave you.
So many times I have people tell me, "I don't understand why this is so important to you" or "Why do you worry about that so much". And when I really stop and think about it, it kind of makes me laugh. We all have "things" that are important to us. To many, the things that are important to me may not make sense. Lets see...
Why do I care so much about my job? I didn't accept my job to make money. If I wanted to do that, I would have put my application in with every fortune 500 company and attempted to be a sales person or something else that generally goes along with financial gain. I definitely would not have taken a position with a non-profit organization. So, why do I care about my job so much? I didn't accept my position as a job. I took it as an opportunity. An opportunity to help myself and an opportunity to help others. I have seen 40 of the 50 states, met thousands of college students, and hopefully helped influence the life of one person. Influencing someones life is worth far more than any amount of money I could ever make...but hey, that is my belief.
Why do I care so much about someone who doesn't necessarily care about me? First and foremost, I am able to care about whomever I would like to care about. What is the difference between the guy standing next to you in a line at the grocery store and the guy you hang out with on friday nights to drink? Sometimes, the seperation is not much more than the fact that you know your drinking buddy's name. People are people. Obviously, not every person is the same. However, in the grand scheme of things, what makes one person that you really don't know more important than someone you don't know at all? If you really think about it, the person you don't know at all could end up changing your life...either in a good way or a bad way. People feel like they are required to help a person that they know simply because they know them. I believe that helping a person is simply based on your willingness to help people.
That's just a little bit of what I care about. The fun part of it all is this. Some people may disagree. Some say, "Your job is still your job" and others may say "Random people aren't worth helping". To those people I say, I guess our conversation is about to end now because it's almost time for that (*insert athletic event here*) game to start, and I know you wouldn't miss it for the world.
So many times I have people tell me, "I don't understand why this is so important to you" or "Why do you worry about that so much". And when I really stop and think about it, it kind of makes me laugh. We all have "things" that are important to us. To many, the things that are important to me may not make sense. Lets see...
Why do I care so much about my job? I didn't accept my job to make money. If I wanted to do that, I would have put my application in with every fortune 500 company and attempted to be a sales person or something else that generally goes along with financial gain. I definitely would not have taken a position with a non-profit organization. So, why do I care about my job so much? I didn't accept my position as a job. I took it as an opportunity. An opportunity to help myself and an opportunity to help others. I have seen 40 of the 50 states, met thousands of college students, and hopefully helped influence the life of one person. Influencing someones life is worth far more than any amount of money I could ever make...but hey, that is my belief.
Why do I care so much about someone who doesn't necessarily care about me? First and foremost, I am able to care about whomever I would like to care about. What is the difference between the guy standing next to you in a line at the grocery store and the guy you hang out with on friday nights to drink? Sometimes, the seperation is not much more than the fact that you know your drinking buddy's name. People are people. Obviously, not every person is the same. However, in the grand scheme of things, what makes one person that you really don't know more important than someone you don't know at all? If you really think about it, the person you don't know at all could end up changing your life...either in a good way or a bad way. People feel like they are required to help a person that they know simply because they know them. I believe that helping a person is simply based on your willingness to help people.
That's just a little bit of what I care about. The fun part of it all is this. Some people may disagree. Some say, "Your job is still your job" and others may say "Random people aren't worth helping". To those people I say, I guess our conversation is about to end now because it's almost time for that (*insert athletic event here*) game to start, and I know you wouldn't miss it for the world.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Unspoken Words
I guess sometimes we let our feelings and thoughts pass us by without ever saying a word. They don't go away, but they never really find a way out. Ironically, those feelings seem to find an escape at what may be considered a bad time. Who knows. I guess I can credit myself with being the master of hiding my feelings and not sharing how I truly feel. Why? I am not really sure. To avoid a bad situation later? Probably. Because I don't necessarily like conflict? That is probably another good reason. Regardless, the one thing that I have learned is that no matter what, the best feeling in the world is having the opportunity to share something that is important to you with someone else who you know cares just as much as you do, regarless of the outcome.
This is where I am starting now. with a new understanding of the importance of something and how it effects others. It's not necessarily just my issue, as there are others around who must deal with it as well for multiple reason.
The cat really helped me out tonight. Not on purpose, but because I needed to get something off of my chest, and it just kinda happened. Thanks.
This is where I am starting now. with a new understanding of the importance of something and how it effects others. It's not necessarily just my issue, as there are others around who must deal with it as well for multiple reason.
The cat really helped me out tonight. Not on purpose, but because I needed to get something off of my chest, and it just kinda happened. Thanks.
Monday, June 05, 2006
The Leader Of The Band
I guess you could say it's pretty crazy, the way that life and the world work. Sometimes it takes losing someone to really open your eyes to how important each day really is. Sometimes we take days for granted. We live life with assumption that tommorrow is going to come and that everyone will be there with us. To be totally honest, it's how things work out most of the time. But the one time that it doesn't happen that way is the time that you stop and look back at the last time you saw that person and what you said.
I lost my grandfather today and I know when the last time was that I talked to him because it didn't happen often. I know what I said because we didn't say much. Nonetheless, every opportunity that I had to talk to him was important to me. Without him, I would not be here. For this, I am thankful. Never forget that each day is a gift and that each person in your life is a gift as well.
An only child
Alone and wild
A cabinet makers son
His hands were meant
For different work
And his heart was known
To none
--He left his home
And went his lone
And solitary way
And he gave to me
A gift I know I never
Can repay
A quiet man of music
Denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldnt wait
He earned his love
Through discipline
A thundering, velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand.
The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul
--My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
Im just a living legacy
To the leader of the band.
My brothers lives were
DifferentFor they heard another call
One went to chicago
And the other to st. paul
And Im in colorado
When Im not in some hotel
Living out this life
Ive chose
And come to know so well.
I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go
--I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And, pap, I dont think i
Said i love you near enough
--The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul
--My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
Im just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band.
I lost my grandfather today and I know when the last time was that I talked to him because it didn't happen often. I know what I said because we didn't say much. Nonetheless, every opportunity that I had to talk to him was important to me. Without him, I would not be here. For this, I am thankful. Never forget that each day is a gift and that each person in your life is a gift as well.
An only child
Alone and wild
A cabinet makers son
His hands were meant
For different work
And his heart was known
To none
--He left his home
And went his lone
And solitary way
And he gave to me
A gift I know I never
Can repay
A quiet man of music
Denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldnt wait
He earned his love
Through discipline
A thundering, velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand.
The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul
--My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
Im just a living legacy
To the leader of the band.
My brothers lives were
DifferentFor they heard another call
One went to chicago
And the other to st. paul
And Im in colorado
When Im not in some hotel
Living out this life
Ive chose
And come to know so well.
I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go
--I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And, pap, I dont think i
Said i love you near enough
--The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul
--My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
Im just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Not Much Going On
Mood: Chill
What's Playing On iTunes?: Now We Are Free: Gladiator Soundtrack
Weather Outside: Cool
What Did I Eat Today?: Chicken Chili, Salad, Pork, Salad, Fries, Salsa
Biggest Accomplishment of the Day: Finally posted some pictures on
Biggest failure of the Day:
Attitude Towards Cell Phone: happy, it has rang a minimal amount today
The Best Week Ever Because: It is my last week in my current position
The Worst Week Ever Because: Two of the greatest people I have come to know are leaving
Enough Said. I'll type more later.
What's Playing On iTunes?: Now We Are Free: Gladiator Soundtrack
Weather Outside: Cool
What Did I Eat Today?: Chicken Chili, Salad, Pork, Salad, Fries, Salsa
Biggest Accomplishment of the Day: Finally posted some pictures on
Biggest failure of the Day:
Attitude Towards Cell Phone: happy, it has rang a minimal amount today
The Best Week Ever Because: It is my last week in my current position
The Worst Week Ever Because: Two of the greatest people I have come to know are leaving
Enough Said. I'll type more later.
Monday, April 24, 2006
Visit to Martin Luther King Jr. Site
Anti-War protestors throwing their signs around during a march.
Ebenezer Baptist Church where MLK went to church as a child.
The proud war supportersGeorgia on My Mind
Me and my friend Jon in Atlanta. I didn't like the city, but it's always good to see friends when you travel!
Chimney Rock Park
Me with my friend Ryan next to the waterfall.
The big waterfall
At the top. Pretty crazy, eh?!
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong
So, it would be wrong of me not to post this, being that it may be one of the best things I have read in a long time. It is like the Simpsons on paper. It is funny because it is true, yet, most people won't get it because they will never understand that it is making fun of how dumb we are. Odd how so many people make arguements that make no sense. I have no clue who wrote it, but I wish I did. Goodness, I guess it just goes to show that we really do have a long way to go in this country.
1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Monday, February 13, 2006
Just Talking I Guess
So I guess this is just me talking.
Mood: Chill
What's Playing On iTunes?: Tears and Rain - james blunt
Weather Outside: Semi-Cold
What Did I Eat Today?: Two Bagels, Apples, Grapes, Yogurt, and a Double Cheeseburger
Biggest Accomplishment of the Day: Made an entire scarf (yes, I made it)
Biggest failure of the Day: still sick
Attitude Towards Cell Phone: content
The Best Week Ever Because: I get to go home for the first time since Jan 2.
The Worst Week Ever Because: Tuesday, February 14, 2006 is Saint Valentine's Day, the most over-commercialized holiday that I would love if I weren't single. :-)
I guess I don't have a lot to say today, I just felt like saying something, so here I am. OK, I have something to say now. It has been a long month. I don't think their is that much left in the month, (because it is the shortest one), but I am surviving.
So I leave Indianapolis on Wednesday to go to Dayton. I stay there until the weekend when I have an opportunity to return home for a day to see my family. From there, it is off to DC/College Park, MD for a few weeks to do some work. From there, I go to Florida, to New Orleans, to oh yeah....then I get to go to Mexico for a week. That should be fun.
Job search is just beginning. Hopefully I will find something sometime soon. That would be nice.
Haven't had much time to talk to my friends because this is my free time (1:30am) SWEET!
Other than that, all is pretty freakin good. No deep thoughts for the day except, "please cold weather, go away".
I'm done.
Mood: Chill
What's Playing On iTunes?: Tears and Rain - james blunt
Weather Outside: Semi-Cold
What Did I Eat Today?: Two Bagels, Apples, Grapes, Yogurt, and a Double Cheeseburger
Biggest Accomplishment of the Day: Made an entire scarf (yes, I made it)
Biggest failure of the Day: still sick
Attitude Towards Cell Phone: content
The Best Week Ever Because: I get to go home for the first time since Jan 2.
The Worst Week Ever Because: Tuesday, February 14, 2006 is Saint Valentine's Day, the most over-commercialized holiday that I would love if I weren't single. :-)
I guess I don't have a lot to say today, I just felt like saying something, so here I am. OK, I have something to say now. It has been a long month. I don't think their is that much left in the month, (because it is the shortest one), but I am surviving.
So I leave Indianapolis on Wednesday to go to Dayton. I stay there until the weekend when I have an opportunity to return home for a day to see my family. From there, it is off to DC/College Park, MD for a few weeks to do some work. From there, I go to Florida, to New Orleans, to oh yeah....then I get to go to Mexico for a week. That should be fun.
Job search is just beginning. Hopefully I will find something sometime soon. That would be nice.
Haven't had much time to talk to my friends because this is my free time (1:30am) SWEET!
Other than that, all is pretty freakin good. No deep thoughts for the day except, "please cold weather, go away".
I'm done.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
If I Could
If I could tell someone something right now, I would tell them.
If I could show someone something right now, I would show them
If I could feel something inside right now, I would feel it
If I could love someone with my heart right now, I would love them
If I could live my life the way it should be lived right now, I would live it
If I could be honest and true, unaffraid of the world around me, I would be.
I would if I could.
Why do we have to live life wishing we could be ourselves?
If I could show someone something right now, I would show them
If I could feel something inside right now, I would feel it
If I could love someone with my heart right now, I would love them
If I could live my life the way it should be lived right now, I would live it
If I could be honest and true, unaffraid of the world around me, I would be.
I would if I could.
Why do we have to live life wishing we could be ourselves?
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Questions of the Heart
Do you follow your heart and how you feel, or your brain and what you think? When common sense tells you no, do you let the power of your feelings take over. When fear digs deep, do you abandon it to see exactly how far you can go using fact?
This is a problem I face a lot, and more than ever, wish I could find a good answer to. People always talk about taking risks and going out on a limb. Ironically, I have never really been that person. Especially when it comes to people. Especially when it comes to people that I care about, have feelings for, or have to be around a lot. All of these people fall somewhat into the same category. I guess the biggest challenge for me is making the decision to make a change that could impact a relationship.
Part of my recent venture has been making decisions that will ultimately satisfy my own personal happiness and not that of others. I am told that if your relationship with someone is solid and you are making a decision to better your life, your relationship with that person will ultimately overpower the decision that was made, regardless of the intial reaction. I guess I question that statement a great deal. What happens when your decision is not necessarily if you should do it for you or someone else, but to what extent you would like to satisfy your happiness.
I can only stop and laugh at myself every now and then because a strength is often balanced out with a weakness. While I enjoy people and love being around them, it is very difficult for me to make decisions that could in any way compromise my relationship with anyone. Is it necessarily a compromise? Maybe not....but as long as you are not at least 75% sure of what direction things may go, in my world, that is a large risk.
So how much does this even make sense to anyone other than me? I am not sure. I can definitely say that it is a huge problem for me and I need to figure out a way to fix it. Is it worth the risk? If it is, how do you convince yourself of it. I guess seeing the future would mean you wouldn't really have to take a risk anymore. :-)
"You must take the risk to disclose yourself in order to become more real, more human. And even if the price is high."
- Isabelle Adjani
"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go."
- T. S. Eliot
This is a problem I face a lot, and more than ever, wish I could find a good answer to. People always talk about taking risks and going out on a limb. Ironically, I have never really been that person. Especially when it comes to people. Especially when it comes to people that I care about, have feelings for, or have to be around a lot. All of these people fall somewhat into the same category. I guess the biggest challenge for me is making the decision to make a change that could impact a relationship.
Part of my recent venture has been making decisions that will ultimately satisfy my own personal happiness and not that of others. I am told that if your relationship with someone is solid and you are making a decision to better your life, your relationship with that person will ultimately overpower the decision that was made, regardless of the intial reaction. I guess I question that statement a great deal. What happens when your decision is not necessarily if you should do it for you or someone else, but to what extent you would like to satisfy your happiness.
I can only stop and laugh at myself every now and then because a strength is often balanced out with a weakness. While I enjoy people and love being around them, it is very difficult for me to make decisions that could in any way compromise my relationship with anyone. Is it necessarily a compromise? Maybe not....but as long as you are not at least 75% sure of what direction things may go, in my world, that is a large risk.
So how much does this even make sense to anyone other than me? I am not sure. I can definitely say that it is a huge problem for me and I need to figure out a way to fix it. Is it worth the risk? If it is, how do you convince yourself of it. I guess seeing the future would mean you wouldn't really have to take a risk anymore. :-)
"You must take the risk to disclose yourself in order to become more real, more human. And even if the price is high."
- Isabelle Adjani
"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go."
- T. S. Eliot
Thursday, January 12, 2006
What is "RIGHT"?
"I'd rather be dead and in heaven than afraid to do what I think is right." - Charles Evers
Maybe it is just me, but do you ever get that feeling that you shouldn't do what you think is right? Not because it is wrong to do it, but maybe the people around you don't want you to. Maybe what is right is not necessarily good. Is it right because you think it is right, or because society says it is right?
I used to believe that you should always do what was right, and then I learned something new. The big question is not how right is it, but why it is right. I can admit that I am a "feeling" person. I allow my heart and feelings to be a big part of the decision making in my life. That probably comes as very little of a surprise to anyone who really knows me. I guess that is why this dillema came about.
What is "RIGHT"?
right (rt)adj. right·er, right·est
1. Conforming with or conformable to justice, law, or morality: do the right thing and confess.
2. In accordance with fact, reason, or truth; correct: the right answer.
3. Fitting, proper, or appropriate: It is not right to leave the party without saying goodbye.
If you look at the three definitions, it makes less sense then it did at the beginning. So, how often do we really do things because they are right? How often do we do things because it is how we feel?
Should I live my life the "right" way, or the way I feel it would be best lived? If you know the right thing is not necessarily the best thing, should you do it? Why do we always have to be "RIGHT". Obviously, I think when Charles Evers says he would rather do what was right, I am not totally sure that he just means right.
RIGHT. A five letter word with a lot more meaning.
Maybe it is just me, but do you ever get that feeling that you shouldn't do what you think is right? Not because it is wrong to do it, but maybe the people around you don't want you to. Maybe what is right is not necessarily good. Is it right because you think it is right, or because society says it is right?
I used to believe that you should always do what was right, and then I learned something new. The big question is not how right is it, but why it is right. I can admit that I am a "feeling" person. I allow my heart and feelings to be a big part of the decision making in my life. That probably comes as very little of a surprise to anyone who really knows me. I guess that is why this dillema came about.
What is "RIGHT"?
right (rt)adj. right·er, right·est
1. Conforming with or conformable to justice, law, or morality: do the right thing and confess.
2. In accordance with fact, reason, or truth; correct: the right answer.
3. Fitting, proper, or appropriate: It is not right to leave the party without saying goodbye.
If you look at the three definitions, it makes less sense then it did at the beginning. So, how often do we really do things because they are right? How often do we do things because it is how we feel?
Should I live my life the "right" way, or the way I feel it would be best lived? If you know the right thing is not necessarily the best thing, should you do it? Why do we always have to be "RIGHT". Obviously, I think when Charles Evers says he would rather do what was right, I am not totally sure that he just means right.
RIGHT. A five letter word with a lot more meaning.
Monday, January 09, 2006
My Search
"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."
-Maya Angelou
-Maya Angelou
Sunday, January 08, 2006
The Light
I always joke with people about how my sanity may be close to gone. I guess the more I think about it, the more I may be telling the truth. I just had what I may classify as one of the most enjoyable weeks of my entire life. Why, you ask? I spent my week in Florida for a wedding. Yes, a wedding. Why did I enjoy it so much? For several reasons. First of all, I got to see some friends that I have not really seen or talked to in years. Second, I didn't have to worry about my job. Third, I had an awesome friend with me. Fourth, I didn't have to worry about anyone or take care of anyone. I guess to some people, this all may sound pretty crazy, so I will start from the top.
I have found that in my life, as much as we definitely come to adjust to our environment, it is very easy to find yourself detached from the world that you used to be a part of. While it may not be dramatically different, the little differences may be the difference between a little and a lot. Of course my life in high school was by no means perfect, nor was it terrible, but it was a part of my life. There are friends that I miss and people that I think about. There is always a certain part of me that will be there, and until this weekend, I think I may have tried to put that aside.
I will definitely say that it was nice to get away from my job. I love what I do, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't carry a certain amount of stress and consume enough of my time that it can become somewhat heavy. I have found that doing a job that you love and have a true passion for is great for productivity, but can be dangerous for your life if you are not careful. Phi Kappa Psi has been influential in the way I have grown throughout college and the short span of my adult life that I have lived thus far. One thing I am realizing however, is that while you may have a certain passion for something, you can not allow that passion to get in the way of your life and who you are. I think this is a problem I often face with both myself and my peers. "Leave the work and take care of 'me' " is the Phrase for today.
One of the most important parts of my trip was my friend. It is nice to have someone around that will be honest with you, be themselves, and accept you for who you are. Their was never a "stop that, you are embarassing me" or a "don't be so stupid". Just fun and acceptance for one another. As much as I would like to say otherwise, that is not something that I find in many people. People always have to be "cool". We don't want to make a fool of ourselves or embarass ourselves. I guess even I can sometimes forget how much fun life really can be and how important it is to just live it. So what if people think you are crazy, as long as you are being somewhat respectful in the process. I love being myself. I guess it is not something I feel like I get to do often while I am working. I can somewhat be myself, but their are always those things that you have to hold back, and sometimes for good reason. You have your work personality and your "life" personality. Unfortunately, due to my job, a majority of my life is spent in "work" mode.
I realize that I worry a lot. I am concerned about other people. It can be annoying sometimes. I am getting better, but I do realize that the best way to avoid worrying about people is to have people around that you do not have to worry about. Be 24. Act your age. It is nice to have people like that around. I have more fun.
In my work, I often tell people that we are only going to get out of our experiences what we put into them. On a larger, much more powerful scale, the same is true for life. We have to live, have fun, and explore. We can't hold back because of what someone thinks or how someone feels. We can't always put ourselves aside for others. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself and make sure that you are enjoying life.
Sometimes I wonder, at the age of 24, what am I going to figure out next.
I have found that in my life, as much as we definitely come to adjust to our environment, it is very easy to find yourself detached from the world that you used to be a part of. While it may not be dramatically different, the little differences may be the difference between a little and a lot. Of course my life in high school was by no means perfect, nor was it terrible, but it was a part of my life. There are friends that I miss and people that I think about. There is always a certain part of me that will be there, and until this weekend, I think I may have tried to put that aside.
I will definitely say that it was nice to get away from my job. I love what I do, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't carry a certain amount of stress and consume enough of my time that it can become somewhat heavy. I have found that doing a job that you love and have a true passion for is great for productivity, but can be dangerous for your life if you are not careful. Phi Kappa Psi has been influential in the way I have grown throughout college and the short span of my adult life that I have lived thus far. One thing I am realizing however, is that while you may have a certain passion for something, you can not allow that passion to get in the way of your life and who you are. I think this is a problem I often face with both myself and my peers. "Leave the work and take care of 'me' " is the Phrase for today.
One of the most important parts of my trip was my friend. It is nice to have someone around that will be honest with you, be themselves, and accept you for who you are. Their was never a "stop that, you are embarassing me" or a "don't be so stupid". Just fun and acceptance for one another. As much as I would like to say otherwise, that is not something that I find in many people. People always have to be "cool". We don't want to make a fool of ourselves or embarass ourselves. I guess even I can sometimes forget how much fun life really can be and how important it is to just live it. So what if people think you are crazy, as long as you are being somewhat respectful in the process. I love being myself. I guess it is not something I feel like I get to do often while I am working. I can somewhat be myself, but their are always those things that you have to hold back, and sometimes for good reason. You have your work personality and your "life" personality. Unfortunately, due to my job, a majority of my life is spent in "work" mode.
I realize that I worry a lot. I am concerned about other people. It can be annoying sometimes. I am getting better, but I do realize that the best way to avoid worrying about people is to have people around that you do not have to worry about. Be 24. Act your age. It is nice to have people like that around. I have more fun.
In my work, I often tell people that we are only going to get out of our experiences what we put into them. On a larger, much more powerful scale, the same is true for life. We have to live, have fun, and explore. We can't hold back because of what someone thinks or how someone feels. We can't always put ourselves aside for others. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself and make sure that you are enjoying life.
Sometimes I wonder, at the age of 24, what am I going to figure out next.
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